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Tuesday, January 04, 2011

ah, the sweet smell of betrayal. 

nothing like a supposed "friend" deciding to make a move on your man before the "body" (relationship) is even cold. i will never fathom an understanding of women who stab friends in the back. i'm not a very forgiving person so i'm going to be grappling with this one for a few months, at least.

i was lied to. i left the sitch in the interest of having to preserve myself and make sure i'm no doormat. i wrestled for days and i made a hasty (but now, smart) choice based in anger and being betrayed. the year turned, i got what i thought was an apology. deeply meant, from the heart, tears and it left me speechless. 

in that speechlessness i apparently gave aquiesence for him to just move on and send me a FB message less than 24 hours later. he's going to date her, this "friend" of mine. a person i had been suspicious of and now it would seem for good reason. i spent my precious time in a vain attempt to help her, be her sincere friend and all along she had a thing. i knew it, i'm not stupid after all, but i decided to see what was what.

i know now and i regret a few things. i don't regret leaving, i don't regret being angry about it and i know i NEVER lied. i also didn't stab a true friend in the back like she did. 

well, i guess my gut was wrong about him. C'est La Vie. sometimes you just have to learn the hard way that once a liar, always a liar. same for cheaters. especially without therapy or shit, even a self-help book. 

me? i'll keep tweeting my feelings, rocking the boat and praying for miracles. i know they exist, i believe in the power of The Universe.


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